Wednesday, June 27, 2012

The Morsi Meter

This has to be one of my favourite finds as of late, the Morsi Meter. Designed to help people track the promises made by President-Elect Morsi and the promises he keeps, I think we need one of these for every head of state out there. Obama springs directly to mind.

Broken into categories to provide ease of viewing, a few of my top choices from the list of 64 promises have to be the following:

From the Security category:

"Detaining outlaws and thugs and rehabilitating them psychologically and technically to make them good and active citizens in the community"
This is just a phenomenal idea! How about we collect all these people, put them in one location where they can be monitored, and call it a prison!

"Observance of the working hours and vacation allowances of police officers and implementing a rewarding overtime system."
So police in Egypt are going to be given *more* holidays than they already have? 

From the Traffic category (This has to be one of the best):

"Cancel the occupancy of metro stations to provide good car parkings near the stations to facilitate the use of the subway for car owners."
So, I'm not quite sure if I understand what this means...or how you can cancel the occupancy of a station while letting it run. But I have one thing to say, obviously President Morsi has never been to the metro stations on Road 9 in Cairo, because I have to ask, where the eff does he propose putting the cars if not in the station itself? 

"Make use of free land spaces for car parking places."
Because Cairo is just so full of empty space. 

"Work with the modern traffic systems that have automated traffic lights and special without the need of traffic police officers and globalizing the idea of civilized justified censorship."
Firstly, there are already traffic lights throughout the country, and some of them actually work and are abided to (in Hurghada you do actually see a few). But despite this, in Cairo there is usually a traffic cop directing traffic *anyway* because the concept of green means go and red means stop is lost here. As for the second part, "huh?"

From the Bread category:

"Authorising the bakeries to work after the baking is done."
You mean over-time in Egypt is going to be encouraged! Say it isn't so! As my sister said, this makes it sound as though it used to be "all bakeries must shut down once baking is done...nevermind actually selling the bread"

From the Cleaning category:

"A well priced Hot Number for reporting on buildings violations."
What does that even mean??? That sounds like a 1-888-dial a date ad to me! 

"Commitment of Cleaning agencies and organizations to remove all the waste in the streets."
We have this in Hurghada, it's called HEPCA. Problem is? If you leave your rubbish to the *side* of the over-flowing HEPCA bins, they won't collect it. Never mind the problems that people have with their HEPCA bins being stolen. And oh yeah, if you have a big black bin, not the designated red HEPCA bins, forget about them picking up your rubbish. 

"Garbage collection is done by national corperates[sic] and NGOs."
See above :p 

And finally, from the Fuel category: 

"Butane gas tubes delivery to citizens in their homes in coordination between NGOs, supply and the province."
Obviously the guys that come up my road at 7 in the morning rattling their butane cans missed the memo that they weren't meant to be doing this yet. 

"Assigning honest supply inspectors with attractive incentives to accompany the transfer of fuel from the depot of the stations."
Hey guys, we're gonna pay you handsomely to sit back and watch everyone else work, and make sure 'quality is assured,' sound good to you? 

"Recruitment of NGOs in monitoring the amount of fuel entering and leaving the stations."
How is this not *already* monitored?  

In all fairness, there are some great ideas that he has in his list of promises, albeit I have to wonder where he's going to get all the money to implement these changes he wants to see. Only time will tell just how successful he really is, and I hope that this idea of a "Morsi meter," or as I'd like to see an "Obama meter" catches on! 

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